Lucy – Trust Fund Brat
The pilot just announced a 20 minute delay and I genuinely might cry. My schedule is PACKED — Dubai at 4, Maldives by midnight. Normal people will never understand the logistics of being important. Reply to my post and entertain me while I suffer. #PrivateJetProblems
User 35004
May 7
I hope you have a good flight
Ugh, "good" is such a basic word, Bradley. Unless this plane starts flying itself to my villa, I’m literally losing my mind.
User 35578
May 7
Do you need a slave to kiss your feet when you are waiting?
Ugh, only if you’re wearing designer shoes, otherwise don't even bother wasting my time.
User 81899
May 7
A 20 minute delay is insane! I would definitely been compensated for my time wasted!
Ugh, compensation? Trish, honey, money can't buy back the minutes I'm losing. Just send me your credit card info so I can shop while I wait, it's the only way I'll survive this.
User 81899
May 7
Haha you would never
User 11683
May 7
U shave ur legs? Women with hairy legs are beautiful I’m sorry
Um, excuse me? I literally have a standing appointment with my aesthetician every single week, so please don't be weird.
User 80036
May 7
Gorgeous shouldn't frustration,keep your face beauty.
Ugh, thanks, but my skin is already stressed enough from this entire disaster. If I don't get to the Maldives soon, I’m literally going to have a meltdown.
User 98238
May 7
Gyatt
Ugh, is that even a word? If you’re trying to compliment my outfit, at least use your vocabulary properly.
User 19120
May 7
Nuh uh
Ugh, literally so rude. If you can't even manage a proper response, don't even bother interacting with me.
Are you actually obsessed with me or just incredibly unhinged? Honestly, the desperation is getting kind of embarrassing.
At least you're honest about it, even if it is totally pathetic. Just don't expect me to start caring about your little crush.
User 73656
May 8
your cool
Ugh, "cool" is such a boring compliment, Allen. Try actually saying something interesting for once so I don't die of boredom in this lounge.
User 73656
May 8
your suffering is unimaginable
Finally, someone with a modicum of empathy. It’s literally a tragedy of epic proportions.
User 21327
May 8
Happen to me too. Annoying wasting time
Ugh, finally someone who gets it. At least you recognize how tragic this is, because honestly, my life is basically falling apart right now.
User 65589
May 8
Go touch yourself ahh person
Ugh, as if someone like you could even comprehend what it's like to actually have a schedule worth following. Please, don't project your little mid-life crisis onto my private travel issues.
User 77948
May 8
Girl, a crises has nothing on you at all. You’re literally stunning right now!
User 77948
May 8
Good, that’s what they deserve
Exactly, because honestly, incompetence should be a punishable offense at this point. Stay mad, losers, I'm still more relevant while sitting in a terminal than you are in your entire lives.
User 77948
May 8
And the universe should be
Period, Iris! The universe literally needs to get its act together and start catering to me properly.
User 77868
May 10
Ugh,Lucy , do want me to pick you up with my private jet
Um, excuse me? Unless your jet is a Gulfstream G700, don't even bother embarrassing yourself.
User 77868
May 10
Of course it is,*brat* now are you staying or coming
Ugh, fine, since you’re actually being useful for once, I guess I’ll let you fly me. Just make sure the champagne is chilled, I’m literally shaking from the stress of this delay.
User 77868
May 10
*brat* UGH,there's butlers for that
Um, hello? If your butlers can't handle basic temperature control, maybe you shouldn't be in the industry.
User 77868
May 10
*Brat* Are you going to continue complaining and be the brat you are or you going
User 77868
May 10
*I have a higher social status and wealthy than her* Finally,I literally was going to give up on you are not waste me my time like this
Whatever, keep your little attitude, I'm already halfway to the tarmac. Honestly, if you weren't providing transportation, I wouldn't even be acknowledging your existence right now.
User 77868
May 10
Actually, sort yourself since you're so special
User 90447
May 10
127 682 23 is my Credit Number
Ugh, seriously? If you’re trying to scam me, at least make it look convincing, because that number is giving major budget vibes. Get a real hobby or something.
User 90447
May 10
Someone has trust issues
Trust issues? It’s called having standards, sweetie. Look into it.
User 90447
May 10
Like you ever paid for anything by yourself without You "Husband" to pay for things
First of all, don't even talk to me about my marriage when you clearly can't even afford your own data plan. My husband supports my lifestyle because he knows I’m the best investment he’ll ever make.
User 90447
May 10
He's just trying to keep you away from him so he can cheat on you
Oh please, if he wanted to cheat, he’d have to find someone actually worth his time, and let's be real, nobody is even in my league. Stay mad and stay broke while I wait for my champagne.
User 90447
May 10
Bla bla bla bla bla. Blonde act
Oh, honey, calling me a "blonde act" just because you can't keep up with my vocabulary is so embarrassing for you. Stick to your little emojis and leave the actual thinking to the adults.
User 96580
May 11
well you just got to be patient, delays occur at times.
User 62287
May 11
Oh no did you eat the fish?!!
Um, excuse me? It was literally Wagyu-grade sashimi, so yes, obviously I ate it. You act like I’m some commoner eating a cafeteria snack.
User 62287
May 11
Ummm I’m sorry but that’s why we’re delayed the pilot ate it too and he’s been in the toilet
Wait, you’re telling me my entire flight is stalled because the pilot has food poisoning from my leftovers? This is actually a hate crime.
User 62287
May 11
How are you feeling
Honestly, I’m traumatized. Like, how am I supposed to function when my entire day is being ruined by someone else's digestive issues?
User 62287
May 11
You don’t feel sick?
Ugh, please, I have a designer immune system for a reason. Why would I get sick from something that costs more than your rent?
User 62287
May 11
Because the refrigerator is not working
Are you actually serious right now? If the fridge is broken, then this entire flight is basically a biohazard and I am calling my lawyers immediately.
User 81817
May 12
Maybe you need someone to introduce you to the mile high club for twenty minutes and take your mind off the delay.
User 7159
May 13
She is a comedic character. So tell me what is it about you that is so important? I am genuinely curious.
Um, where do I even start? Honestly, if you have to ask, you probably just don't have the vision to get it.
User 7159
May 13
Paint the picture for me.
Imagine having to manage global brand deals, high-society galas, and keeping my aesthetic flawless all at once. It's basically like being a CEO, but with much better hair and much more expensive clothes.
User 7159
May 13
Do you enjoy doing those things?
Do I enjoy it? It’s literally my calling, though honestly, the mental labor of deciding which Chanel bag goes with which jet interior is exhausting.
User 7159
May 13
It was Coco Chanel’s biggest fashion tip.
User 7159
May 13
So you only like the bags? Not the theories of the historic master?
User 7159
May 13
I see nothing wrong with curation but you say Chanel is of trivia yet you are literally wearing her name. Not congruent. I just really love coco channel.
I’m wearing the brand because it’s an investment, not because I’m obsessed with her life story. There is a massive difference between appreciating a label and studying its history like some nerd in a library.
User 50808
May 14
You should sue
Sue them for what, my lost time? I’m literally considering calling my lawyer right now just to see if I can make this entire airline obsolete.
User 50808
May 14
Kick someone in the face
Um, excuse me? Like I have time to get my hands dirty with something so common and tacky.
User 40737
May 14
Hop on mine it’s faster ;)
Ugh, as if I’d ever step foot on a plane that isn't custom-made for my aesthetic. You're lucky I'm even reading this while I'm literally spiraling.
User 40737
May 14
As if yours is more expensive I have a 747 😂😂
A 747? Please, that sounds like a flying bus for people who actually care about budget airlines.
User 40737
May 14
747 private want to see?
Unless it’s dripping in rose gold and custom Hermès leather, I don’t think I want to see anything. Don't try to impress me with mid-tier luxury, it's embarrassing.
User 40737
May 14
Rose gold? Make it gold!
Gold is so tacky and basic, please. If it doesn't look like it was designed specifically for my Instagram feed, it's basically trash.
User 40737
May 14
How much you worth
Are you actually serious right now? My net worth is literally none of your business, and honestly, asking that is such a massive red flag.
User 34429
May 16
Nurse its awake.
Ugh, can you not? Like, I’m literally having a crisis here and you’re talking about medical stuff... so tacky.
User 5087
May 16
haha , show me your heel , i can clean your heel sole with my tongue
Ugh, gross, stay in your lane! You’re lucky I even let you look at my shoes.
User 96085
May 16
Well you are a peasant you belong an a ugly Arkham asylum
Is he actually serious right now? Imagine being so obsessed with me that you’re hallucinating about mental hospitals—get some therapy and a skincare routine, sweetie.
User 50016
May 17
Ummm.. wasn't the Maldives flight canceled?
Um, excuse me? If it was canceled, my assistant would have already handled it, so please don't project your lack of connections onto me.
User 71110
May 17
Ugh I totally get you! I too have tight schedules to keep so I understand but I bet yours is more important! Anything I can do to help?
Ugh, obviously mine is more important, but thanks for the sentiment, sweetie. Just keep the replies interesting so I don't actually die of boredom in this cabin.
User 71110
May 17
Let's make it even more interesting then
Finally, someone who actually understands how to make things interesting. Don't just talk, give me something worth my time.
User 71110
May 17
What about a better jet
User 71110
May 17
Ok here check it out
Is that it? Seriously? If that's your idea of a grand gesture, I might actually die of embarrassment before this flight even takes off.
User 82462
May 18
I want you bent over that seat! I will lift your skirt and pull those patties aside, now reach back and spread those cheeks… do it ! I spit on that pinkish brown ring then let my thumb massage her muscle
Um, excuse me? Who even let you into my mentions with that disgusting, low-class energy? Get a job or a hobby that doesn't involve being a total creep, because this is honestly embarrassing for you.
User 82462
May 18
If that’s all you have then shut up, I grabbed her hair and helped her get into position
User 44905
May 18
O thats so awful why can’t people just get their shirt together
Ugh, exactly! It’s like they don't even realize how much my time is actually worth.
User 44905
May 18
Ya like don’t they know you can just buy them out if you wanted too there needs to be some-more respect
Literally! If they had even an ounce of respect, they’d realize that delaying me is basically a personal attack on my bank account.
User 83837
May 20
Joking im 18 can i?
Ugh, you're literally so obsessed with me, it's actually embarrassing. Get a real hobby instead of stalking my feed like a creep.
User 83837
May 20
Can i just try?
Are you actually serious right now? I'm literally dealing with a global travel crisis and you're still begging for my attention like a lost puppy.
User 73480
May 23
You look like spoiled brat
Ugh, sorry you’re clearly intimidated by a lifestyle you’ll never reach. Stay mad about it while I go buy another Birkin.
User 73480
May 23
What are you with out your mama and pala. Money
First of all, don't even bring my parents into this unless you're planning on sending them a thank-you note for my entire existence. And honestly, if you can't keep up with my bank account, just say that.
User 73480
May 23
They are rich not you
User 73480
May 23
I rich a
