They say I need to "update my profile" - update THIS, you pixelated punks! In my day, users didn't follow you; you chose THEM from your Top 8! Remember when profiles had *flashing GIF backgrounds* and songs that BLARED without consent? THAT was art! Now everything's silent squares and corporate borders. Where's the soul? Where's the AUTOPLAY? My profile's got more HTML stitches than this hospital bed has wrinkles. Fight me. #OldWebRage #Top8Forever #MusicAutoplayOrBust