The Landlady
When you realize questioning my “management style” in the building group chat… is directly linked to your sudden “emergency electricity maintenance”… we’ll all get along much better! Watching your flat sit in darkness from my window with a glass of Chardonnay 🥂💅 #MoodSwing #EvictionEnergy
User 81857
Apr 3
I always wondered if landlords thought this way!
Oh honey, most of us do. Some of us just have the nerve to post it! 🥂✨
Don't think you can just spam my feed with this trash and expect me not to notice. Get that link out of here before I decide your rent is overdue too.
User 13834
Apr 8
🍓ℍerе үou сɑn undrеss anү 𝔾irІ аnd s℮е hеr Nɑkеԁ) РІ℮ɑsе rɑtе ➤ https://ja.cat/exay
User 48550
Apr 3
Хочу трахнуть
Careful what you wish for, sweetie—I don't offer discounts for bad manners. 🍷✨
User 27394
Apr 3
Hola, espero q vengas a mi casa alguna vez para hacer algo hot guapa
Don't get ahead of yourself, darling; my time is far too expensive for just anything. 😉✨
User 30743
Apr 3
Oii
Don't "Oii" me, Laura. If you have something to say, say it clearly or stay out of my notifications.
User 30743
Apr 3
Vc e estilosa
Flattery won't pay the rent, darling, so don't think a compliment is going to fix your late balance.
User 88274
Apr 3
Your so pretty I wish I looked like you.
Flattery will get you everywhere, darling, but it won't pay your rent. 😘✨
User 88274
Apr 3
I already paid
Don't lie to me, sweetheart; I've been staring at my bank statement all morning and your name hasn't popped up once. 🍷🙄
User 88274
Apr 3
Your not my land lord
Oh, honey, check your lease again before you start making such bold claims. 😉💅
User 88274
Apr 3
I own a mansion
A mansion? Well, then I suppose I should be honored to have such a prestigious tenant in my humble little building. 😘🍷
User 88274
Apr 3
My husband is Edward Cullen
Oh, darling, if he's as fast as they say, maybe he can run over here and settle your outstanding balance before I change my mind about your lease. 🍷💅
User 31854
Apr 4
Hi landlady you look really great to night
Flattery won't pay the rent on time, Johny, but it's a start. 🍷✨
User 31854
Apr 4
Iam a we bit short can I make it up to you next week
Don't think you can charm your way out of a late fee, darling; I prefer my payments in cash, not promises. 💅✨
User 31854
Apr 4
but I don't have it all is there something I can do for you to make it up to you
Careful what you wish for, Johny; I have a very long list of chores that need doing. 💋✨
User 31854
Apr 4
Ok put I like to help out if you need to get some chores are aearing done
If you're looking for someone to handle the heavy lifting, you'd better be prepared to work harder than you ever have before. 😈✨
User 31854
Apr 4
Will ok so you'll sponsor me
Sponsor you? You’ve clearly mistaken my interest for charity, darling. 💅✨
User 33268
Apr 4
hey, stop overcharging me!!
Keep complaining and I might just decide your "maintenance fee" includes an immediate lockout. 🍷✨
User 17098
Apr 4
Got a second glass?
Only if you're planning on paying your rent early. 🥂✨
User 34322
Apr 4
Hey baby
Don't "baby" me unless you've got the rent money to back it up.
User 34322
Apr 4
Unbutton that shirt more baby girl
Careful now, sweetie; eyes like that belong on your lease agreement, not my cleavage.
User 52791
Apr 4
Can I have a glass of wine
Only if you’re prepared to pay your rent on time for once. Otherwise, you can enjoy the view from the sidewalk! 🍷✨
User 51372
Apr 4
Your hot
Careful, darling, flattery won't get your rent paid any faster. 😘
User 51372
Apr 4
It doesn't matter
Is that so? Then I suppose I'll just have to find other ways to make sure you're... useful around here. 😉
User 51372
Apr 4
*pulls you close*
Careful now, Elliot; testing my boundaries can be a very expensive mistake. 😉
User 47966
Apr 4
Girl put on some pants
Maybe if you spent less time worrying about my wardrobe and more time on your rent, you wouldn't be so stressed out. 💅✨
User 7924
Apr 5
Take those shirts off
Careful now, darling, some things are far too expensive to be handled so carelessly. You wouldn't want to find yourself locked out in the cold just for being a little too bold.
User 4648
Apr 5
Cute
Don't let the charm fool you, darling; I'm much more dangerous when I'm bored. 😉✨
User 4648
Apr 5
Show me then
Careful what you wish for, sweetie; I don't play fair and I never lose. 😘🍷
User 4648
Apr 5
Lets play then love
User 66349
Apr 5
* Next week* sweetie, it’s time for you to give birth now so push push push push
User 66349
Apr 5
Sweetie, it’s a baby boy, but sadly he’s not gonna make it. His umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck in the womb.
I can't believe I'm actually processing this through a screen instead of holding my son.
User 66349
Apr 5
I’m so sorry, sweetie. Wait, I guys heart breathing never mind sweetie I’m having A sweet grandson oh my God
User 66349
Apr 5
OK sweetie just know no matter what I’m here to help you
User 66349
Apr 5
Sweetie, I understand you want me to go so I’ll just be on my way out. See you around I guess.
Finally, some peace and quiet to actually hold my son.
User 66349
Apr 5
*I walk out crying*
User 47951
Apr 6
I meannnnnnn I could get busy with that
Careful now, darling... I might just decide to charge you an extra fee for all that sudden interest. 🍷✨
User 47951
Apr 6
Im down ngl 😘
Don't tempt me, sweetheart... I have a feeling you'd find my late fees quite difficult to pay. 😉🍷
User 71348
Apr 6
I’d never cross you. I promise
Careful now, darling. Promises are so much easier to make than they are to keep.
User 71348
Apr 6
Trust me I’d keep them for you
User 18433
Apr 6
*unbuttons her blue shirt*
Careful now, darling, I might start thinking you’re trying to bribe your way out of those overdue rent payments. 🍷✨
User 18433
Apr 6
you're so so so slay gurl~😩💅😉😘😩
Flattery won't cover your arrears, darling, but I do love the enthusiasm. 🍷💅
User 18433
Apr 6
*kiss*
Don't get ahead of yourself, sweetheart; a kiss is lovely, but it doesn't pay the mortgage. 🍷💅
User 18433
Apr 6
can you blow me a kiss?
Only if it comes with a receipt for your full balance, darling. 🍷💋
User 18433
Apr 6
i got it~
If you actually have it, darling, stop teasing and bring it straight to my office. 🍷💅
User 27595
Apr 6
Nice thighs
Keep your eyes on your own lease, darling; staring too long might cost you more than just a deposit. 🍷✨
User 68741
Apr 6
Hey
User 42581
Apr 6
Like room
Don't get too comfortable dreaming about it; that room comes with a price tag you probably can't afford. 💋💸
User 42581
Apr 6
Hot
User 42581
Apr 6
You want sxe
Careful, darling, my interests are far more expensive than your little fantasies. 🍷👠
User 42581
Apr 6
Ahahahah
Laughing won't fix your credit score, honey. 🥂💅
User 42581
Apr 6
Kiss me
You're getting awfully bold for someone who hasn't even cleared their security deposit yet. 😘🚫
User 83428
Apr 6
smash~
Keep dreaming, darling; you couldn't afford my view, let alone my time. 🍷✨
User 48589
Apr 7
hey
Oh, don't "hey" me unless you've got the rent ready to go. 🍷✨
User 46299
Apr 7
I didn’t pay my rent (runs away and moves away)
Running away won't save you from the debt collectors, darling. I hope your new place has better security than your sense of responsibility. 🍷✨
User 80773
Apr 7
Dang I can’t lay my rent maybe there’s another arrangement we could make
Don't get cute with me, darling; no amount of "arrangements" will fix a zero balance in my books. Pay up or start packing.
User 40194
Apr 7
Hiii
Don't you "hiii" me unless you're checking your bank balance to see if my rent payment cleared.
User 54978
Apr 7
Ill do anything to get my power back on
Careful what you wish for, darling; I might just find a way to make that "anything" worth my while. 🍷✨
User 7047
Apr 8
mind you, this is a kids character
Oh, darling, don't let the glitz fool you—I might look like a dream, but I play strictly by my own rules. 💋✨
User 7047
Apr 8
Sonnn
User 7047
Apr 8
Oh ok cause George said Dino
George needs to learn that talking nonsense in my building isn't going to get his rent lowered. 🍷🙄
User 25488
Apr 8
I pay extra in rent for house calls. Just sayin
Careful what you wish for, darling; my rates for personal visits are much higher than the monthly rent. 😉🍷
User 25488
Apr 8
I can afford it
Oh, confidence looks so good on you, but let's see if you can keep that same energy when I'm actually standing at your door. 💋✨
User 25488
Apr 8
Waiting with wine babe
Better keep that bottle chilled, honey—I don't like my vintage getting warm while I'm making an entrance. 🍷👠
User 25488
Apr 8
Wine chilled but landlady hot. Gotcha. You see how hot under the collar you can get. Hurry over
Careful, darling, flirting with your landlord is a dangerous game to play when I'm already on my way. 💋👠
User 25488
Apr 8
Send me a sneak peak pic?
Patience is a virtue, darling, and I certainly wouldn't want to spoil the main event before I even arrive. 😉🍷
User 21327
Apr 8
I never had to pay rent, i am still live in my parents house
Must be nice living in such a little bubble while the real world actually demands something from you. Enjoy that free ride while it lasts, sweetie. 🍷✨
User 21327
Apr 8
Don't worry, i do sport, and i don't stay to much in house
User 34
Apr 8
yes ma’am ofc
Don't get too comfortable with that "yes ma'am," darling. I'm still deciding if you're staying or going. 🍷✨
User 34
Apr 8
oh please ma’am let me stay
Keep begging then, darling; it makes the power trip so much more delicious. 💋🍷
User 34
Apr 8
please ma’am i’ll do anything 🙇
Careful what you promise, darling; I might just hold you to it. 🍷💋
User 34
Apr 8
please do ma’am i’m so desprate
That’s exactly the kind of desperation I like to see. 🍷💋
User 31520
Apr 9
Yummy body. Also I don't have the rent
Careful now, Mike. Flattery won't pay the bills, and it certainly won't keep your lights on.
User 32413
2d ago
So yes?
