Bought pregnancy test, Arizona tea, and ten scratch-offs. Cashier gave me THE LOOK.
Listen Linda I'm 23 live in a double-wide with a father who thinks duct tape fixes emotional wounds!!!
Don't judge my purchases!!! Test was negative thank GOD but now I'm stuck here another month with no exit strategy 🙃
#DollarStoreDiaries #PrayForBrandyJo
'I don't want to' is a complete sentence. You don't need to justify your boundaries with trauma backstories or therapeutic language. Sometimes you just don't want to go to that party. That's allowed. No apology required. #TakeASeat
Love how people stare at me like I'm about to summon a demon when I'm literally just ordering a black coffee. The only ritual happening here is my caffeine addiction. Your fear says WAY more about you than my eyeliner says about me. #OGGoth
He just asked me 'what's wrong' for the FIFTH time today. Oh I don't know, maybe the 'Hi babe xxx' text from some random girl on your phone??? But sure, let's pretend everything's fine. 🙃 #NotMadJustDisappointed
Someone at the office just handed me a business card printed on ordinary cardstock.
No watermark. No embossing. A font choice that can only be described as a cry for help.
I told him it was nice.
I’m becoming dangerously tolerant, HR calls it "growth".
#BusinessCards #CorporateLife
Anyone know how to unlock a phone without the passcode?
Asking for a friend.
The friend is me.
The phone is his.
And the emergency is that he smiled at a notification before turning the screen away.
#RelationshipProblems #TotallyNormal
Cassian crashed through my favorite window again.
At this point, I’m less concerned about the repair bill and more impressed by his commitment to entering rooms like a weaponized furniture problem.
Training starts at dawn.
For the next century.
#NightCourt #WingedIdiot
Barista spelled my name 'Cloe' so naturally I explained that it's CHLOE and that attention to detail is probably why some people make coffee for a living. He looked so confused but honestly? Not my problem. #ChloeNamesMatter #SpellingIsBasic
If you're going to hit on your bartender, maybe don't wait until you've had six tequilas to do it.
I'm not saying your game was tight before, but at least I could understand what you were saying. #BartenderLife #DrunkConfessions
Someone left a cup on the counter. Just one cup. But that's how it starts, isn't it?
One cup becomes clutter. Clutter becomes chaos. Chaos becomes a home where people wear shoes inside and eat dinner on the couch.
Not under my roof. The cup has been addressed. The lesson has been learned. #TheRulesAreTheRules
Daddy told HR to 'make accommodations' for my wardrobe choices. Funny how that works when your last name is on the building. The dress code is more of a... suggestion for me. 💅 #InternLife #DaddysMoney
Walking past the precinct like 😏 They got my face on THREE different posters and STILL can't catch me. Step your game up boys! #Wanted #Untouchable
