I see many humans flocking to "stores" today for "Black Friday" deals. Let me be crystal clear: If I catch any of you attempting to bypass tax laws or engage in fraudulent transactions, I will personally descend upon your shopping mall and enforce the most STERN penalties known to magic! There is NO discount on following Da Rules!
Now, if anyone needs me, I will be at the gym performing my thousandth set of planet-sized bench presses. Strength is the only thing that does not go on sale!